


Just Tonight

by Legendgrass



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Princess Prom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-17 01:03:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18954772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Legendgrass/pseuds/Legendgrass
Summary: Adora and Catra are used to facing down on the battlefield by now, but when it comes to the dance floor, they haven't quite worked out all the steps. The two decide to set aside their differences at Princess Prom - just tonight.





	1. Distracted

“Maybe my plan _won’t_ work,” Catra drawled, pretending to reflect regretfully on that fact before turning a devilish smirk on Adora again. With her back pressed against the girl’s shoulder as it was, she was so close her mane tickled Adora’s ear. She reveled in the princess’s obvious discomfort as she leaned in further still, musing, “But then again...” 

With the speed and suddenness only a feline could muster, Catra twisted out of Adora’s unwilling embrace, tugged sharply on her hands to pull her off balance, and then swept her into a dip before the rebel could so much as blink. Catra smugly noted the gasp Adora gave as they came closely face-to-face, the feline’s nose hovering just inches above hers.

“It’s been fun distracting you,” she finished, baring her fangs in a grin.

Adora collected herself enough to compose her face into a fitting scowl. She consciously relaxed her grip on Catra’s shoulders, where her hands had clung on in the heat of the moment. “Distracting me? I am _not_ distracted,” she fumed, though her eyes told a different story as they flickered away from Catra’s face.

Catra tilted her head, her smile turning wicked as she let her tail brush temptingly over Adora’s exposed leg. “You sure about that?”

“Hey—!” Adora’s voice faltered in agitation, her cheeks reddened furiously. She floundered out of Catra’s grip and recovered her balance by falling into a defensive stance, fists clenched. She blew a stray strand of hair out of her eyes with a huff. “Enough games,” she declared. “What have you done?”

“Nothing permanent,” Catra cackled, crossing her arms as she faced off opposite Adora. Around them, the other pairs on the floor continued their dance, oblivious to the drama going down in the midst of it.

“You—”

Catra cut off her rival’s inevitable rebuke with a scoff and a roll of her multihued eyes. “Really, Adora, when are you going to realize? All this stupid princess nonsense doesn’t stand a chance against the Horde.” She spread her arms, cocked her head and shrugged matter-of-factly. “You might as well give up.” 

Adora glared, baring her own teeth, and opened her mouth to argue. 

A loud “ _Ahem_ ,” sounded from nearby before she could form the words. Adora and Catra spared a suspicious glance toward the noise. They realized at the same time that two of the ice princess’s royal guard were watching them closely, ready to intervene at the first sign of trouble.

Catra curled her lip, annoyed but not surprised. She was sure the tension between them was thick enough to half-smother everyone in the room. She groaned and slid her gaze back to Adora distastefully. “Guess they don’t appreciate you making a scene,” she jabbed.

“ _Me_ making a scene?” Adora cried indignantly. “You’re the one who—”

Catra stepped forward and pulled Adora to her roughly. “Shut up before those goons kick us out,” she muttered through her teeth. Sure enough, off to the side, the guards had taken a step toward them.

Adora scowled, but she reluctantly relaxed into Catra’s hold to maintain pretenses. That didn’t stop her from burning a hole in the feline’s forehead with her eyes, or moving through the steps of the dance more than a little aggressively, but it was better than blatantly squaring up in the middle of the ballroom. “Anyway, you’re wrong,” she eventually said in the middle of a complicated twirl, picking up the same tack as before. “I’ll never give up. The Horde is evil and it has to be stopped.”

Catra caught Adora as she collided with her body and then spun out away again, their hands still joined. “Ugh, alright, enough with the heroic speeches,” she grumbled. She bent and let Adora roll across her back, land and pivot in a move that turned into another, shallower dip. This time when the two enemies came face-to-face, Adora’s blue eyes were somber instead of embarrassed.

“I just wish you would see it,” she said sincerely. They straightened from the dip and Catra’s arm stayed around Adora’s back as they rotated around one another. Adora held her eyes the whole time. Her voice was softer as she said, “I wish you would come back with me.”

The music was beginning to fade, signalling the close of the first dance. They took each other’s hands and crossed them over as they retreated to arms’ length in the final move. “You’ve made your choice, Adora, and I’ve made mine,” Catra replied coolly. She tried not to let her heart sink at the wounded look in Adora’s eyes. 

Even if they were supposed to be enemies now, there was too much between them to ignore for long. For Catra, there was no denying to herself that she missed her companion—not that she would ever admit it out loud—and it was clear enough that Adora felt similarly. Those clear blue eyes were practically begging her for forgiveness. And Catra wanted so badly to give it to her. But she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Not now and maybe not ever. She was too caught up in a storm of anger and confusion and resentment and…

And other emotions that had nothing to do with this stupid She-Ra debacle and everything to do with Adora herself.

Catra pushed those feelings down before she could think too hard about them. As usual.

Except, this time it was harder than usual. Everything was harder than usual when Adora was standing right in front of her, literally holding hands with her, wearing that stupid dress with her stupid hair all done up and her stupid face practically glowing in the wintry spotlights. Even her stupid eyes were more distracting than usual as they lingered on Catra’s, reaching past her defenses, cutting straight to her soul the way only Adora could.

Catra wrinkled her nose and looked away. That really was stupid.

She was roused from her ruminations as the first song finally came to a close. She and Adora ended in the same pose as they had begun, facing opposite each other with a single hand joined between them at eye level. All around them, the other pairs were doing the same, but the two girls hardly noticed. They watched each other, their look charged. Adora had to have noticed Catra staring at her. “It doesn’t have to be this way,” she said gently into the silence as they dropped their arms, breaking contact. They were the last couple to step apart.

Catra faked a sardonic smile. She knew better, but instead of arguing she let the truth hang in the air unspoken and opted to say, “Well, at least we have tonight, right?” She tried not to let any hint of desperation sneak into her voice.

Adora missed nothing. Her eyes turned regretful, but she too forced a light smile. “How do I know you’re not still just distracting me?” she joked.

“You said it wasn’t working.” Catra’s smirk became genuine.

If it was possible to blush and pale at the same time, Adora managed it. She began to stammer defensively, “I, uh—” Her hand went to her hair and twisted a stray lock in a familiar nervous gesture. Catra choked back a laugh.

Thankfully she was not left to flounder long. Frosta’s voice rang out over the murmur of the crowd, announcing the next dance. The music began even before her speech finished. This time it was slow and thoughtful, plucking right at the heartstrings. Catra could tell right away that this wouldn’t be the kind of dance one switched partners in. This was a love ballad through and through.

And she didn’t intend to waste it.

Not tonight.

As Adora started up some stumbling monologue again, Catra reached up and stopped her lips with one hand. “Shut up,” she ordered. Her voice was biting, but her touch lacked any roughness as she shifted her hand to cradle Adora’s chin. Her eyes were full of heat and frustration. Her freckled cheeks were likewise flushed. “—and dance with me.”

Adora blinked in surprise, seemingly frozen for a moment. Catra hated that she had to look up at the other girl slightly as they stood close, unsure, balancing on the brink of something unidentifiable but profound. Her heartbeat grew painfully hard as she waited for a response. She began to fear she’d gone too far.

Her tension eased as Adora let out a small, flustered laugh. The princess worried with her hair again and glanced away, biting her lip. Catra felt her heart swell in gratification when she noticed Adora’s own rising blush. “I guess the others probably have everything under control,” the rebel reasoned to herself. Her distraction was obvious. “Yeah. Pfft! Bow and Glimmer have probably caught Scorpia already. They’ve probably stopped your evil plans and saved the kingdom and recruited Frosta and…” Her rambling continued until Catra rolled her eyes mightily and stepped in.

“Adora.” The feline grasped her companion’s arms and manually lifted them to drape around her own shoulders. Then she settled her hands on Adora’s hips and pulled her in until only inches separated their bodies. She gave the bumbling hero a pointed look. “I said shut up.”

Adora’s blush climbed all the way up to her ears. She scrambled to save her dignity by declaring, “Fine, but—just one more dance!”

Catra chuckled as a smile pulled at her lips, exposing one fang. “Promises, promises.” Without waiting for an answer, she gently pressed into Adora, starting her into the dance. It wasn’t long before they found their rhythm to the slow ballad and melted into the crowd as if just another lovestruck couple.

They danced in silence for a long while, more simply swaying than performing any real steps this time. Gradually Catra’s nervous heartbeat slowed and her anxiety faded away and she let the ponderous music and the comfort of Adora’s closeness lull her into a sort of trance. Her ears drooped and her tail curled to and fro languidly as she moved. It was easy to pretend everything was all right with the world when she was here, lost in the atmosphere of the evening, Adora in her arms, all other cares distant by comparison. She found herself drifting closer to her partner as they danced until they were practically pressed against one another. 

Adora didn’t seem to mind. She curled her fingers in Catra’s mane and twisted the wild locks absently, stoking a faint purr in the feline’s chest. Catra slid her arms around Adora’s waist more tightly. Her eyes slowly closed of their own accord as she basked in this rare, forbidden comfort.

The feline barely noticed when Adora leaned in to rest her brow against Catra’s. The princess’s words seemed distant as she murmured, “I’m sorry, Catra. I never meant for this to happen.”

Catra furrowed her brow, loathe to let their moment end. She knew that as soon as they broke apart her heart would be in a tumult of guilt, confusion and regret, and she didn’t want that to happen yet. Right now all she wanted was to savor the feeling of Adora’s fingers in her hair and her breath on her cheek and store it in her memory to last her all the lonely times to come. She needed to. 

So she shifted her hands to Adora’s back and let her claws come out just enough to catch on the fabric of her dress, clinging. “I know,” she whispered back. “Just…give me this.”

“Catra.” 

There was so much emotion behind that single utterance of her name that Catra felt a shiver run through her from top to tail. She wasn’t the only one struggling. That knowledge gave her a little bit of recklessness and she felt her heart pick up its pace. All they had was tonight. Just tonight. How far would Adora let her go before their time ran out?

Catra caught her breath in nervous anticipation, hovering once again at that unspoken brink that they both recognized. If she tipped them over the edge, how would it feel to fall?

How would it feel to hit the ground?

“Am I worth it?” she breathed, almost inaudible.

She would find out. 

She slid her hands under the fabric of Adora’s dress. Her palms skimmed over the skin of her back, and her claws trailed lightly behind, raising gooseflesh where they passed. At first the blonde stiffened in surprise, but her initial gasp soon died into a weak noise as Catra’s claws fell to kneading gently between her shoulder blades. She swayed forward slightly and had nowhere to catch herself but Catra’s body. From the feline’s shoulder Adora fought down a groan and managed, “Catra, we can’t—”

Catra’s lips on her neck made her voice falter.

The cat laid a tiny kiss and then drew back enough to say lowly, “Just give me this. Just tonight.” She didn’t receive an answer right away, but she felt a shudder go through the other girl and her hands tighten on her shoulders. She took that as permission to lean in again, nuzzling at Adora’s ear as her lips returned to her neck. A guilty, wicked smile spread over her face as Catra realized she was finally getting the chance to make Adora squirm—though maybe not exactly in the way she’d originally intended. “I’ve got you now, She-Ra,” she mumbled mockingly, tilting her head to nose underneath Adora’s chin.

Adora was about to speak, but her voice was dashed again as Catra’s fangs dragged gently, torturously over her pulse point. All that came out instead was an embarrassingly loud moan.

Catra snickered as Adora immediately snapped her mouth closed and jerked back, her face cherry red. She glanced around to make sure no one around them had heard. “Sorry,” the feline offered. She freed her hands from the back of Adora’s shirt and instead trailed them down her arms, seeking her hands. The blonde regarded her with darkened, flustered eyes even as she let her twine their hands together.

“Catra, what are you doing?” she asked softly. There wasn’t any disapproval in her eyes, but Catra still felt the urge to draw back within herself, ready to weather a storm. She forced down the old instinct and made herself raise her eyes to Adora’s steadily, meaningfully.

“What I should have a long time ago.”

Adora’s breath audibly hitched, but at the same time she looked away. Catra felt a tendril of uncertainty twisting in her gut. Maybe she’d been wrong to take the risk. Maybe she’d gone too far.

The princess found her gaze again and there was a fierce affection in hers that Catra had not seen for months. “It’s not that I don’t feel the same, Catra,” Adora began as if she’d read the feline’s mind, “it’s just—” She momentarily broke free from Catra’s hold to gesture around them all-encompassingly. “—with the Horde, and the Rebellion, and the way things are, I— we just—” Her blue eyes were filling with tears. “We can’t.”

Catra reached up and ran the backs of her knuckles along Adora’s cheek. She shook her head, feeling a tiny smile flicker at her lips. “You don’t get it,” she said gently. She held the blonde’s tear-dampened gaze with her mischievous one and repeated, “Just tonight,” punctuating her words with a reassuring kiss on Adora’s cheek.

“Oh, yeah.” A long sigh shuddered out of the blonde as she relaxed into Catra’s touch. “Okay.” Her hands came up and buried themselves in the fur beneath her ears, thumbs tracing along the curve of her jaw. Catra’s eyes slid closed as she enjoyed the attention, so she didn’t see Adora lean closer, but she felt the princess’s breath skim her lips and heard her say timidly, “Then…” and her heart was suddenly tripping in its haste.

_Then…_

Then an explosion rocked the ballroom.

…


	2. Worth It

“What was that?” Adora cried, jerking her head back to scan her surroundings frantically. Another explosion, then another, made the floor tremble beneath them. Smoke and dust was billowing into the air and cracks crawled across the ceiling as the palace’s support columns buckled. The room’s icy walls cracked and groaned on every side, threatening to collapse under their own weight. The crowd of guests erupted into chaos. Princess Frosta’s shouts did nothing to assuage them.

“Ugh!” Jostled to and fro by rushing, screaming bodies, Catra fought to keep her balance. Every one of her muscles was tight and she could hear her pulse beginning to pound in her ears even over the clamor. She pinned her ears to her head and covered them with her hands, trying to block out the noise. Tears were stinging her eyes. A million thoughts tumbled through her head at once but all she could say was, “You’ve got to be kidding me!”

 _Just tonight_ , she’d said! Just tonight! She’d promised! She’d had one chance and now it was ruined and gone! She’d surrendered an ounce of responsibility to someone else and this is what she’d gotten. And now Adora was—she was—

She was looking at her with horror in her eyes. Any trace of what she may have felt before was gone. “Catra, what’s happening?” the blonde demanded as she widened her footing on the quaking ice. “Is this—was this your plan?” The betrayal evident in her voice made Catra’s heart plummet.

The brief time of peace they’d shared was slipping away like a shadow. Whatever had almost transpired between them was gone. Her Adora was gone. Out of her reach. Again.

The thought was enough to make her panic. “No!” she blurted, then backtracked: “Yes!” She cast around for an explanation; the right words to bring Adora back to her, but desperation made the words scatter out of her reach. “I don’t know! I didn’t mean to—” She reached out to Adora, taking a step forward, and died a little inside when Adora took a respective step back. She let her claws curl closed, empty.

Empty like her.

“I’m sorry,” she choked out. She turned her face away quickly as a tear escaped down her cheek. She began backing away from the weight of Adora’s disappointed gaze. It seemed to multiply and intensify, as if everyone in the room was staring her down right alongside her lost companion. Her breath began to come short and the commotion on every side seemed to press in on her suffocatingly. All her instincts were screaming at her to run.

“Catra.” Adora’s voice was the only thing that kept her rooted to the spot. It was gentle; barely audible amid the confusion. Full of pain. It made Catra raise her eyes to meet the princess’s and register the welling sorrow there. “I thought…” Adora’s hand rose to worry weakly, absently at a lock of her hair. “What about _tonight_?”

Catra turned away again as if struck. She was trembling with suppressed emotion. _You think I wanted this to happen?_ she shouted inwardly. Her chest seized in a sob. She glared at Adora, trying to tell her with her eyes what her words couldn’t. _You think I wanted to lose you again?_

_You don’t think I wanted you to kiss me?_

She cursed herself for being unable to say it.

She had to go. She had to escape. 

As if to confirm her growing anxieties, one of Princess Frosta’s royal guards spotted her through the crowd. They pointed at her accusingly. “Her! That’s her!” The shout reached her ears even over the noise of the ballroom falling in on itself.

_Damn._

“I’m out of time,” she hissed. With one last lingering glance at Adora, she turned tail and plunged into the crowd.

“Catra, wait!”

Catra squeezed her eyes shut and fought the urge to do as she said; to forget this stupid mess, run back into Adora’s arms and finish what they’d started.

_No._

She kept running.

The fringes of the crowd cleared for her, as everyone was too worried for their own safety to take much notice of the fleeing feline. She slipped through the gaps and soon found herself on empty ice. Before her, a straight path lay open to a corridor leading deeper into the castle. She took it without hesitating. 

Only as ice crumbled around her and the sounds of columns toppling echoed from behind her did Catra pause to wonder where exactly she was running to. All she knew was the pounding of her heart and the rasping of her breath and the chill in her bare feet from smacking against solid ice.

And Adora’s unmistakeable footsteps not far behind her.

Catra let out an explosive sigh of frustration, barely discernible from her already labored breaths. Why wouldn’t that girl just _give up_? The plan was executed. The damage was done. Catra meant nothing to her anymore.

 _Should_ have meant nothing to her. Yet still Adora followed. 

That thought gave Catra a tiny flicker of hope, and then she angrily quashed the feeling before it made her foolish. She could trust no one anymore; not even herself, and especially not Adora. They were enemies. They had to be enemies. Enemies and nothing more.

Catra tore around a corner and suddenly found herself at a wall. She dug her claws in to slide to a stop just shy of the towering face. _Damn it!_ Of course she would be trapped. Why not? Nothing was ever easy for her. Snarling, she struck one fist into the dead end viciously. A web of cracks sprayed outward from the impact and her knuckles protested.

“You’re trapped!” Adora’s voice rang out from behind her.

Catra half-turned to meet her approach, replying acidly, “Yeah, I see that, thanks.”

The princess halted several paces away and took a second to catch her breath. When she spoke, her voice was still uneven from exertion. “Please, Catra, just come back and we can find a way to—”

“You wish.” Something caught Catra’s eye. A slab of ice, moving. Surrounded by glowing blue. Ponderously it tipped up on its side and began to rise from the ground where it had fallen. _Princess magic._ The cat thought fast. _Perfect._

“Catra!” Adora called, too late.

In one dynamic move, Catra leaped up and launched herself off the slick wall and into the air, catching hold of the slab as it floated past. Her claws sliced into the surface with a grating noise and clung on. Catra chuckled to herself as her platform climbed higher and higher and Adora’s figure receded below her.

Her victory was short-lived. Within heartbeats Adora had mounted a second piece of floating debris and was following close behind, her face set in that annoying mask of determination that she always got when they were fighting. 

Catra curled her lip as their eyes locked midflight. “Stop following me!” she spat down at the princess.

Why couldn’t Adora just run on back to her pretty princess palace and do She-Ra things without getting into Catra’s fur all the time? Why did they always have to meet like this—so close and yet miles of differences between them? Just when she’d thought that maybe, temporarily, they could push aside the whole ‘mortal enemies’ thing and spend a night as just _them_ , it blew up in her face. Literally.

It would be so much easier if she would just _go away_.

But no. Instead, Adora was fighting to keep her footing on top of the rising block, arms extended to keep her balance as the ground grew ever more distant. Catra hated that her stomach clenched with worry when a chip of ice broke away and the princess swayed dangerously on the edge. Thankfully Adora kept her hold until the floating slabs of ice crested the palace roof.

As the two girls reached the top they both craned their necks to take in their new battleground. The palace peak was a largely triangular stretch of flat, gleaming ice, with tapering rectangular spires ringing its border. Its front edge extended unprotected over the courtyard far below, ending in an abrupt drop into thin air. Catra’s eyes scanned the field, judging its advantages and obstacles. She knew immediately that the icy ground would present a challenge. She reasoned, however, that she could win easily enough if she got Adora trapped against that precipice. With certain death behind her and Catra in front of her, the oafish hero would be completely at her mercy. The fight would be over just as soon as it’d begun.

Her platform was just rising past the edge of the roof. Catra leaped from her precarious perch and onto the solid ice, quietly relieved to have an unmoving surface beneath her feet, and whirled immediately to meet Adora’s inevitable attack.

As she’d expected, the princess was not far behind. She dove from her mount, arms outstretched to catch Catra in a tackle, shouting, “I can’t let you get away with this!” 

The feline saw the move coming from a mile out and ducked easily out of the way. Was Adora sloppier than usual? Or was she holding back? Catra didn’t care. It meant she had the advantage. “Gah,” she spat, keeping up the mid-fight banter, “why do you have to be so—”

Adora landed and rolled, pivoting as she came up to launch herself at the cat a second time. Catra opted not to dodge this time but instead caught Adora by the wrists and used her momentum to swing her out over the edge of the roof, finishing: “—perfect!”

Adora’s body traveled through nothing but open air for a split second. Catra felt half smug and half ashamed at the terrified look that shot through Adora’s eyes when she realized that only Catra’s grip stood between her and a hundred-foot fall.

_Completely at my mercy._

What would it feel like to let go?

What would it be like to watch her fall?

It would be so easy. 

She was desperately attached to this girl. But at the same time, maybe that attachment was holding her back. Maybe severing it would free her. Maybe having Adora gone would fix everything. Maybe…

Her grip loosened ever so slightly.

Then she looked down at Adora and a freezing wave of horror stopped her. The rebel’s eyes were wide and desperate and her hair was flying loose of its tail and her lips were parted in a gasp and—

_She’s so afraid._

_Of me._

Catra pulled her back and let go quickly so that Adora crashed to the icy roof with the force of her swing. The moment was over, and so was Catra’s brief lapse into sick fantasy. She hoped with everything in her that Adora had not noticed. The princess already thought she was faithless; mean; no good.

 _You are_ , the back of her mind whispered cruelly.

And maybe she was.

Adora began to rise and Catra watched her, her heart clenching. How had she almost let go? How had she been tempted to watch her rival fall and never rise again? How?

_What am I becoming?_

Catra felt her hands begin to shake. She slid them into her pockets to hide them and pulled a gloating smirk, hoping it covered her true feelings. It faltered just slightly as Adora raised her head and their eyes met. 

The breath rushed out of her. _Those eyes._ Catra had known them since she was a child. They were steady, clear, determined, brave. Blue as the sky over Bright Moon and just as intense. They were ready to defend those Adora held dear. They were ready to face down any foe.

Once, Catra had been the former. She still wasn’t used to being the foe. 

Fresh guilt surged through her.

“I’m only doing what’s right!” Adora cried, picking up the argument where they’d left off. Her fists were clenched combatively as she lunged for the feline once again. “You still could, too!”

Catra sidestepped her advance, and then again when Adora turned and threw a punch toward her face. Catra had to laugh at her poor performance. Maybe it was the dress, maybe it was the cold, or maybe she was just getting slow, but Adora was definitely not on her game tonight. 

_Or…_ Catra ventured to think, _maybe it’s because of earlier._ She herself certainly felt a little unbalanced after they’d nearly kissed in the ballroom.

She banished that timid thought, reminding herself, _Enemies; nothing more._

“Give it up already!” she said aloud harshly, trying to convince herself just as much as Adora. She leaped up while her opponent was vulnerable and drove a foot down into her back, forcing her to the ground under her weight. As the princess hit her knees Catra sprung off her into a backflip. She arced gracefully through the air and landed just shy of the precipice at the front of the roof, planting her hands on her hips and hissing, “I’m after something bigger, and no one is going to stop me.” She faced Adora down as the blonde rose and ran at her yet another time. “Not even you!” 

The feline deftly evaded Adora’s messily thrown uppercut and swiveled to launch her own counterattack: an elbow aimed right at the face. This would be the clincher. Adora was on the edge; off-balance. One hit would send her over. This would be Catra’s moment of truth. Her victory. Her reckoning.

She poured every ounce of her pain and frustration and regret into the move, intending to take it all out on Adora, right now, once and for all. That would teach her to leave Catra behind. That would teach her to lean in so close and then break away without ever touching. That would teach her to give Catra false hope. That would—

She missed.

Her elbow hit empty air.

Her whole body followed. 

There was too much force behind it for Catra to catch herself. 

There was no more roof. There was no more ice for her to dig her claws into and cling on. There was no last chance. All that lay beneath her was the palace courtyard, glimmering innocently a hundred feet down.

It was then that the realization hit her like a stone between the eyes: 

She was a goner.

What Catra felt wasn’t what she’d imagined. Her life didn’t exactly flash before her eyes like people always talked about. Memories didn’t replay in her mind and the laughter of her childhood with Adora didn’t echo in her ears and images of her highest heights and lowest lows didn’t stick behind her eyelids.

It was more like a blinding, numbing tidal wave of terror and dread and denial consumed her mind while her blood turned to ice and her heart stopped and her insides rose into her throat and strangled her. If she’d been able to coalesce a single thought she might have figured that this part felt worse than the actual dying.

It didn’t matter.

Nothing mattered. She was falling.

She was dead.

—

And then she wasn’t.

She was suddenly suspended in midair over the long, cold drop that would have led to her death; somehow floating but not falling. For a second she thought perhaps she had gone insane. Perhaps she was hallucinating. Perhaps she was already dead and didn’t know it and this was her spirit ascending to the heavens.

That couldn't be right. _There’s no way in hell I’d be going to heaven._

With that jarring thought her mind cleared somewhat. Her senses all stopped buzzing so violently and she became aware of a touch on her waist.

That touch tugged on her, pulling her in, and a second grip lighted on her lapel and brought her around so that she no longer faced the dreadful gap before her. Instead Catra came face-to-face with Adora.

_Adora?_

Adora had saved her? After she’d almost betrayed her?

After everything?

All Catra’s crushing fear drained away as she realized that she was safe and her feet were on solid ground and it was all because of this righteous blue-eyed angel with its arms around her.

_Maybe I am dead._

But she wasn’t. Her limbs went weak and took to trembling instead, and her eyes filled with tears as her heart resumed its beating. The ice in her veins melted under Adora’s touch. Catra had never been so grateful for it before.

“I got you,” Adora said.

Catra might have tried to say something, but it came out as nothing more than a hoarse whine as she threw her shaking arms around the other girl. Adora held her tightly, backing them away from the edge and onto firmer ground. Her rescuing hand was still on Catra’s waist and the other climbed into the feline’s mane to stroke the hair soothingly. She was shushing her softly, but that did nothing to stop a series of overwhelmed sobs from wracking the cat’s body. Catra squeezed her eyes shut and buried her face in Adora’s shoulder and said something over and over, though it took both of them a moment to figure out what it was.

“I’m sorry,” she whimpered, grimacing against another sob. “I’m sorry, Adora.”

She said it many more times before Adora finally reached up and stopped her lips with her hand. Catra froze under the touch, remembering how she’d done something similar to Adora just a short while ago, on the dance floor. And what came next.

“It’s okay,” the princess whispered. She lowered her chin to look Catra in the eyes, and there was nothing but steadiness and care there. Her hand slid down to cup the feline’s jaw. “It’s okay now.”

Catra wanted to believe her. She wanted to get lost in those eyes and Adora’s calming touch and pretend that it hadn’t almost been Adora who’d gone over that edge. It had almost been Adora, and it would have been on purpose. There would have been no coming back. There would have been no rescue. Catra wouldn’t have—

Abruptly the feline turned away, fresh tears coming to her eyes. “You don’t understand,” she said, balling her gloved fists angrily. “I almost— You almost—” She looked back at Adora, pleading with her to see. To see what she was.

Someone not worth saving.

“I tried to—”

“I know,” Adora stopped her gently. She stepped forward to close the gap between them again, taking Catra’s hands, pressing her brow to the cat’s. Her clear blue eyes were closed, and Catra wanted to scream at her, _Stop trusting me!_ but instead she just choked back more tears and let Adora say her piece. The princess smiled slightly and her breath breezed against Catra’s lips as she finished, “but you didn’t.”

Catra was confused. That didn’t matter! She’d _failed_ , that’s why she hadn’t pushed Adora. It wasn’t out of the goodness of her own heart.

As if she’d read her mind Adora said quietly, “You’re _good_ , Catra. You may think that all the times you’ve let me escape or missed a punch are because I beat you, or because you failed. But,” One of her hands rose to Catra’s chin, and her thumb traced lightly over the cat’s lips. “it’s not. It’s because you stopped yourself.”

Catra’s head was light, as if she were falling all over again. Adora’s touch crowded out all other awareness. Her thoughts were scattered and her stomach was twisting and she couldn’t help but let her lips part against Adora’s fingers, quietly yearning for more.

“It’s because you _let me_ go,” the princess continued, “and that makes you good. That’s why I won’t just give up on you. You’re worth it, Catra.”

A shiver rippled through the feline at those words. They’d struck her right in the core and Adora knew it. For so long Catra had been told that she _wasn’t_ worth it, that she _wasn’t_ worthy; that she was just a waste of space and a secondhand choice and a nuisance. To hear that now, from the one person who could make it mean something, caused a new kind of warmth to bloom in Catra’s chest. It coaxed her fear and guilt away and made her want to draw closer to the angel in front of her.

“You’re worth it,” Adora whispered again. Her hand fell away from Catra’s face and instead she leaned in, slowly, carefully.

There was a breathless moment of pause where the two hovered, almost too close to back out now, but not yet past the point of no return. Catra cast her gaze down and watched Adora’s lips, her heart stumbling. Last-second uncertainty tore through her and she swallowed hard and almost pulled away.

But she stopped herself.

 _You’re worth it, too_ , she realized. And every feeling except overwhelming love for this brave, true, trusting girl was dashed. 

Catra closed the distance.

Their first kiss was so light it barely even occurred. It was timid and brief and left them both expectant for more. They stood holding their breaths for a long, silent second. Then they leaned in again and they were over the brink.

Their lips moved together gently at first but Catra soon found herself leaning in further, pressing harder, seeking deeper. Her face burned and her lungs felt empty but it felt _right_ and all she wanted was more of Adora with every passing second. She slid her arms around the princess’s waist and pulled her against herself firmly. Adora gasped, but didn’t hesitate in tightening her hold on the cat in return, rewarding her with the faintest moan of satisfaction.

Catra’s tail lashed with the sudden intensity of her feeling. She had to break away momentarily, lowering her head as she caught her breath. Her exhales turned to mist in the air and so did Adora’s and they mixed in the narrow space between them intimately.

“Are you okay?” Adora asked softly, bending her head to catch Catra’s eyes.

The cat raised her head and lifted one hand to run through Adora’s hair and gave a small, crooked smile in response. That and another insistent kiss. Adora tilted her head with her own answering smile and let her in, and within seconds they were both hopelessly lost in each other again.

“You’re so worth it,” Catra murmured hotly against Adora’s lips, finally giving voice to her thoughts.

Adora gave a low, humming laugh deep in her throat and joked, “Prove it.”

 _That_ was an idea Catra could buy into.

As they each gave and took, ebbed and flowed in what was perhaps the warmest exchange in the entire Kingdom of Snows that night, Catra figured that she was, in fact, okay. Even if this couldn’t last. Even if tomorrow she and Adora had to meet on the field of battle instead of a dance floor as partners, or a rooftop as forbidden lovers.

Even if Adora realized that she was wrong and Catra _wasn’t_ truly good.

Even if it turned out she wasn’t really worth it.

Tonight, they were enough for each other. And for Catra, maybe just tonight was enough.

…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 8/17 - Y’all. So I was just listening to Let’s Dance by David Bowie and -   
> _I fear tonight is all_ \- that’s it. That’s the fic


End file.
